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“I’m Not Sure I Love My Son – Am Considering Giving Him Up”

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“I’m Not Sure I Love My Son – Am Considering Giving Him Up”

An emotional confession of a mother who doesn’t feel ready.

A mom of a two-year-old toddler seems to be hanging on the last straw as he feels mentally exhausted from her days juggling between parenting and working. The mom wrote, “My son is nearly 2. By this stage, I thought I would’ve settled into life as a mum and have my sh** together.”

However, life hasn’t been going the way she wants it to be. To be precise, she finds herself unsure about her life and might even feel like this was all wrong.

She never thought she’d go from having the “picture perfect” mom dream to feeling “so far from that” that she’s starting to hate herself now.

"I’m Not Sure I Love My Son – Am Considering Giving Him Up"
Unsplash

In the emotional confession piece she wrote on Mumsnet’s ‘Am I Being Unreasonable’ section, she shared, “My days feel stressful and rushed. Nothing seems calm, and I feel like I’m just not enjoying my life right now.”

“I work four days a week 8-5, and I barely have time to do anything in-between.”

Unfortunately, her baby has had an irregular sleep schedule since the first day. And for the past two years, she’s always been getting around three, at most four hours of sleep.

But it’s become even worse recently as the toddler learned to throw a tantrum, and it just seems to “trigger something awful” in her.

“I’ve had days where I feel like don’t like him very much,” she typed after admitting that she feels ashamed of it. She also just doesn’t want to be around him sometimes.

"I’m Not Sure I Love My Son – Am Considering Giving Him Up"
Unsplash

She spends almost all her time when she’s not working next to her toddler and complains how she “can’t seem to get five minutes to myself.” The woman added, “There are times where he’s screaming and crying for me, and I’ve had to just walk away.”

The mom admitted that she could’ve “easily just screamed back at him,” but she knows that isn’t right and walked out of the room on so many occasions.

“I’m starting to even question if I love my son,” she wrote. “Because surely a mother that loves her children does not feel like this towards them.”

She ended up thinking if it would be better to leave her family and son.

"I’m Not Sure I Love My Son – Am Considering Giving Him Up"
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“I would, of course, still see my son; I’m not suggesting I never see him again,” she wrote.

“I think a few times a week spending time with hun will be better than him having to live with me the way I feel.”

“I don’t want to damage my son but feel I am just not adjusting to be the mum I so badly thought I would be.”

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