Funny
30 Most Random, Hilarious Tips That’ll Keep Your Daily Tedious Life A Little Spicier
Tips to fill your life with laughters!
Sometimes, you shouldn’t live life so seriously. Adopting the half-full point of view in life can take you a little further than you think. These life tips aren’t meant to be taken seriously, but they do have a point if you pay attention. These are definitely the funniest tips you don’t want to miss. The internet is filled with people sharing some truly wholesome, lighthearted life tips. Like how getting lemons in life just mean you gotta make some nice lemonade for yourself!
Good advice is always appreciated, but sometimes we just have to jest around in life because nothing is as good as realizing that you’re enjoying life despite what’s happening. Scroll and enjoy the list! We know you’d also love to share these funny tips with your loved ones and friends.
1.
“If you swim with a friend, your chances of getting eaten by a shark will drop by 50%.”
2.
“If you don’t know where your kids are in the house, turn off the internet and watch them magically appear.”
3.
“Never use your favorite song as an alarm. You’ll start to hate it.”
4.
“Ladies, if a man says he’ll fix something, he will. There’s no point in telling him about it every six months.”
5.
“If you hear weird noises in the night, simply make weirder noises to assert dominance.”
6.
“Don’t sweat the petty things and don’t pet the sweaty things.”
7.
“If you wait until the last minute to do it, it only takes a minute to do.”
8.
“Drinking can cause memory loss, or even worse, memory loss.”
9.
“If you teach a man to fish, you feed him for one day. If you feed him to the fishes then he’ll never be hungry again.”
10.
“If you find a toilet in your dream, don’t use it.”
11.
“Be a Caterpillar. Eat a lot. Sleep a lot. Wake up beautiful.”
12.
“If you attempt to rob a bank, you will have no trouble with rent or bills for the next ten years, whether you are successful or not.”
13.
“If you are not happy where you are, move. You are not a tree.”
14.
“When you fart in public, yell “Jet power!” and walk faster.”
15.
“If you can’t blind them with brilliance, baffle them with nonsense.”
16.
“Eggs are good for your health. But sometimes we get fed up with them. Add some butter, chocolate, sugar, flour, and then bake. Now it’s not so boring to eat them every day.”
17.
“If life gives you lemons, squeeze the juice into a water gun and shoot other people in the eyes.”
18.
“Don’t let go of your wife’s hand at the mall, because she will start shopping. It might look romantic, but it’s actually economic.”
19.
“If you ever get caught sleeping on the job, slowly raise the head and say in Jesus name, Amen.”
20.
“Trust dogs. They always know who to stay away from.”
21.
“No matter how nice the hand soap smells, don’t leave the restroom smelling your fingers.”
22.
“If your kids suddenly start getting along and are nice to each other for no reason, be very suspicious.”
23.
“Don’t give up your dreams, keep on sleeping.”
24.
“If you break your bone in two places, don’t go to those places again.”
25.
“Eat whatever you want, and if someone calls you fat, eat them too.”
26.
“Marry someone who has a different favorite cereal than you so they won’t eat all of yours.”
27.
“Carry a fork with you. If someone tries to rob you, pull it out of your pocket and say, ‘thank you Lord for this meal I’m about to have’ and charge at them with the fork.”
28.
“You don’t need a parachute to go skydiving. You only need a parachute to go skydiving twice.”
29.
“Don’t yell at your kids, lean in close and whisper, it’s much scarier.”
30.
“If no one comes from the future to stop you from doing it, then how bad of a decision can it really be?”
