20 Of The Weirdest Things Teachers Hear That Left Them Speechless

Working as a teacher can be very stressful, but at the same time, it can be equally rewarding. At the same time, these people have heard things that you can’t really hear elsewhere. While they did ask for them to share some “fun facts,” let’s just say that enough of these would make us frown when shared.

Without further ado, please scroll on. Makes you wonder what these students were thinking when they said what they said in front of the class. A goldmine of the weirdest things a room full of children going through puberty say.

1.

“You will think less of me if you google me.” – AusGeo

2.

“I teach middle school, This one still takes the cake.

That his mom and dad have the same parents. I asked him to clarify because I didn’t understand what he was saying and he said, “I only have one set of grandparents, they had the same parents” I quickly moved to the next student so no one else would realize that this kid just told the class that his parents were siblings…

I talked to him about it the next day in private and he said that he got it mixed up, his parents don’t have the exact same parents, they shared a dad… I felt so much better when the mom called me to let me know her elderly step-father married her husband’s elderly mother. still weird, but much better.” – woffdaddy

3.

“‘I’ve had my hand up a sheep’s bum’ shocked me slightly. Child of a farming family, helping with lambing season…” – gringaellie

4.

“It wasn’t weird but actually cute and funny. I was teaching fifth grade and this kid, white as paper, goes my name is _____, but you can call me Lebron. He had an obsession with Lebron James and I did in fact call him Lebron whenever I wanted to get his attention. Great kid.” – nrjjsdpn

5.

“That he has been to juvie multiple times and is currently on probation. Then he pulled up his pants enough that everyone could see his ankle monitor. That was… something.” – whateverreddit88

6.

“I had a student tell me that sometimes his dad got drunk and asked his mom for things; as I was starting to tell him he didn’t need to elaborate any further, he continued with “like soup and he yells it like ‘Soooooooooup’” it took every bit of restraint to not laugh. It’s been years and years since that happened but I still laugh when I think about it.” – chrissiwit

7.

“A student once told my wife that her daddy had a special device that he had to blow into to start his truck.” – marshallsays

8.

“I work with preschoolers (3-5 age group). One day we had the kids go around and tell us one thing that made them special. Most were pretty normal (I’m really good at drawing, I have two big sisters, etc). And then I get to this one little girl—super cute and sweet. Looks me dead in the eyes and goes “I have been around forever. I have seen the whole world and I know everything.” Dead serious. Super creepy. When I pressed her, she couldn’t really find the words to explain, but kept talking about how she “came from the sand”, and was frustrated that she couldn’t “say it better”. I didn’t use to believe in past lives, but now I’m not so sure.” – wisebird24

9.

“Not a teacher but I just did a first aid course. During introductions, say your name and one fact about yourself, dude says proudly he once had over 300k of UNpaid parking tickets.” – paxtonious

10.

“I know a lot about medieval torture equipment.” – TransplantTeacher94

11.

“That she was a public pooper. I still remember her first and last name so good job freshman from 8 years ago.” – ltlflwr

12.

“Taught elementary school the past few years. One kid told me he was a dragon when he was born but changed into a human as he got older. He was absolutely convinced and couldn’t be persuaded.” – Reddit

13.

“Kid in my kindergarten class said, “My peepee fell off at Disneyland.” I didn’t ask any follow-up questions.” – HEYYMCFLYY

14.

“Coach (at the time) not a teacher so slightly different relationship. End of year 7 UK school, aged 12. The question was slightly different, you had to say something that had changed about yourself over the past year.

One boy stands up and simply says: pubes.” – cheshire92

15.

“I’m not a teacher, but this may qualify. As a freshman in college, this kid named Brenton told our class his name was “Brent5on, but the 5 is silent”. He was a weird cat. I mean do you man, but it was the most awkward silence from the lecture and professor I have ever witnessed.” – Jordansalterego

16.

“I don’t ask for a fun fact, but on the first day I always ask, “What’s your most recent obsession?” (low-stakes, building affinity networks, etc. etc.) in my first semester, a student said “air.” As in oxygen.” – applesngiraffes

17.

“My dad had a student tell him during the fun fact question in detail about how his goldfishes died that morning and how he experimented on their corpses. He had pictures on his phone of the skin off and the intact skeleton next to it.

“He is a successful taxidermist now so silver linings I guess.” – Control-Familiar

18.

“I am not a teacher but this guy in my class named Shane has this medical condition that causes him to grow tons of hair at an early age. Full beard in middle school. He would say, ‘I’m Shane and I’m very hairy.’” – _JazzyJake_

19.

“I am raising cockroaches in my closet to sell to the reptile shop.” – Sheldon_Turtle

20.

“A student, not a teacher, but once we were going around a circle during percussion camp in the front ensemble and my teacher goes, ‘Hello everyone, my name is ____ and I have s**t my pants as an adult.’” – iiinnkk