‘I’m A 36-Year-Old Virgin, And Men Often Ghost Me When They Find Out’


'I'm A 36-Year-Old Virgin, And Men Often Ghost Me When They Find Out'

Dating has been challenging for Sonali Chandra due to her strict perspective on intimacy. Her lack of experience in the bedroom has been a setback for most men she has come across, yet the 36-year-old virgin from New York, US, insists she’s waiting for marriage to pop her cherry. She was 26 when she first told a guy about her virginity status.

According to Sonali Chandra, two men she had been serious about turned their back on her after knowing she was a virgin and wouldn’t seal a deal until after marriage.


She said in her interview with SEEN TV‘Even with those two other relationships, they ghosted me when they found out that they couldn’t have premarital sex with me. It’s heart-wrenching and makes me think that guys only think I’m good for sex.’ Sonali added that some men make wild assumptions about her sexuality, with a few suggesting she’s not really into men if she won’t sleep with them.


Sonali Chandra had been raised in a very conservative way, which means she viewed s*xual intimacy as ‘sacred and special.


“The guy who was my first kiss, my first actual relationship, he was shocked. His jaw dropped and he asked if I was gonna be a virgin for eternity. “I’m like, ‘Listen, dude, I need a ring, you know?’ He ghosted me after six months on my birthday,” she told the publication. “Men have questioned if I am straight, they say that I’m asexual or think I’m lesbian. The truth is, I am a heterosexual female. I have strong values and high morals and I consider sex sacred and special.”

As with her strict upbringing, which had an impact on her dating life, Sonali also claimed s*x outside marriage left her with numerous fears.


She admitted, “The biggest concern for me was getting accidentally pregnant. It’s so easy for men. It’s an easy in and out, right? For us women, it’s a long process. “There are so many health issues—STDs, UTIs, getting accidentally pregnant—even if they’re on the pill. Celibacy means I don’t have to deal with all that stuff.” Sonali has so far not had much luck meeting someone, and even while she was swayed by men after going public with her news at age 33, most eventually ran off.


She concluded: “They know that I’m a virgin; it’s something that they want to conquer. I have a personality and emotions, and I want a man to want me for all that too. Not just because I’m a virgin.” Sonali wishes others would stop pressuring her to just do it, as she continued, “Society should respect people for their own choices. We need to normalize not having sex and still going on dates. There’s nothing wrong with prioritizing emotional connection over physical desires when it comes to dating.”

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Joseph Adeyinka: Joseph Temitope Victoria, nicknamed ‘Temmie,’ is a GreenLemon Author and Content Creator. After her studies at Olabisi Onabanjo University, where she got a B.Sc. degree in Geography and Regional Planning, Temitope worked as Journalist with a specialization in Business and Economy. Temitope also holds an M.Sc. degree in Population and Manpower Planning, and interestingly she’s a self-taught poem writer. She owns a website ‘TemmiesAnthology’ and has spent nearly 6years writing on several niches. Whenever there’s free time, she spends it editing books – one of her newest is ‘In His Green Book’ by Terence A. Asitibasi. Temitope can certainly do whatever she sets her mind on.